Halloween

*A few years ago. Names and minor details changed*

So I had been dating this girl for a while and things were going pretty well. She was stupid hot; the kind you can't leave in a bar by herself. She was also the kind you knew would eventually leave, but while she was around....goddamn it was a wild ride. She was 5'9, dark hair, green eyes that I love, and tattoos in all the right places. In fact, her newest tattoo at the time was a design that i'd drawn up myself and she put it on her body in permanent ink! So of course I was all about her like a lost fucking puppy. It didn't help my situation at all that she was a complete freak in the sack. She like being spanked and choked and tied up and all sorts of wild shit that I knew nothing about at the time. Shit, we were both young, but this girl was years ahead of me in sexual experience (a thought that I didn't like to dwell on much but did enjoy when she broke out the advanced moves). We met playing poker and hit it off immediately. Within a few days of hanging out we were texting obscene shit across the poker table to each other, and sneaking off during tournaments to fuck in the parking lot. When we weren't together we were texting or talking on the phone. We did all of the dumb cute shit that couples do. I can admit it fully now, this chick had me all fucked up and wrapped around her finger. She had me so brainwashed and unaware that I didn't see any of the classic red flag "get the fuck out" warning signs.
It started with a few cancelled dates. We'd have plans to go to a party or go to dinner and she'd bail to hang out with her dad, or say that her best friend needed to talk about something important. There was always another excuse and they were all way too perfect. At the time I believed that she was innocent and that she was telling the truth. But honestly who leaves the house at 1am to drive her best friend to court at 6am and doesn't turn her phone on the entire night. She said she spent the night with her best friend to make sure they both woke up on time, and then left her phone off because she was in the court room. Like I said, an excuse that was TOO perfect. It made sense, but things like that don't pop up with no warning, and I had heard nothing about it until she was walking out the door. Another example: who plays pool until closing time at a late night dive bar, supposedly with their father, and can't manage to answer a text or return a call? Huge red flags, but I was smitten and stupid. It didn't happen all the time. Hell, it wasn't even very often. I still got to hang out with her and get my alone time when I wanted, so I didn't think anything of it. She was a dirty, dirty girl, but in my whipped state of mind I actually believed it was just for me. I should have known when we were out and she wouldn't ever actually claim me as more than a friend. It was subtle, but had I been paying attention I would have noticed she never introduced me as her boyfriend. Shit, after a while, she all but ignored me at poker unless she wanted a drink or it was time to leave. I conned myself into believing that it didn't matter, because she was coming home with me. Well all of the bullshit came to a big, explosive, obnoxious shitstorm one night when I caught her.
I had seen her earlier that day. We had made plans to go to a Halloween party with some friends from her school. The party was about a block off campus and a lot of my friends lived in the same area. Of course, she cancelled. Something about her dad having playoff baseball tickets or a girls' night at her friend's house. Who knows? I couldn't keep all of her bullshit straight anyway, so oh well. Whatever the reason was, I told her I was gonna head to our local bar and spend Halloween there, getting belligerent drunk and acting ridiculous. Lee and I ended up meeting up with Sean at a bar across the street from our local spot. It was a place we'd never been before, depsite how close it was to where we were almost every other night of the week. I was in a shitty mood from being stood up for the third Friday in a row so I was drinking Rusty Nails, nothing but Scotch and Drambouie, with no mix. A terrible drink, but one that will fuck you up with a quickness. Just about everyone else had already been drinking so I had some catching up to do. I pounded the first two Nails like they were Gatorade after a marathon and then took God knows how many shots while waiting for my next one to arrive. Within an hour, I had run my tab up to almost a hundred bucks. Everyone was dreading the direction this level of intoxication was taking me at such an early hour except Sean. He was encouraging my drinking and was the main evil sonofabitch buying me shots. He hated Brittany because he saw through the bullshit that was clouding my vision the entire time we were together.
"I think we should go to that party," he said between tequila shots. I was in no state to make any type of decision or argument, so we paid our tabs and I hopped into his car. We headed out to the party and the closer we got, the more the alcohol began kicking my ass and sending me deeper into my belligerent state. My biggest problem when I drink is that I can handle my alcohol. That might not sound too bad, but it was for me. I could drink like a fucking sailor, and would never throw up, never stumble or slur my words, but my brain would shut off and turn me into a half-retarded five year old until I got some food in me and sobered up. I was almost at that level when we got to the house. Sean knew it and so did everyone else on the front lawn as soon as the car parked in front of the house.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING YOU ASSHOLES?" I was yelling at nobody and everybody at the same time. It was a halloween party, they were wearing costumes. I seemed to have forgotten that I was wearing a huge set of fake tits over my normal clothes. Simplicity in costumes had been one of my main principles that year. I pulled a bottle of what looked like orange soda, but was actually at least half rum, out of my back pocket and continued drinking. Sean turned off the car and hurried after me, already chuckling at the thought of the scene I was going to make at this party. As I rounded the corner to head into the garage, I nearly choked on my drink. There sitting in the driveway was Brittany's stupid Scion. NO. FUCKING. WAY. This could not be happening. I was entirely too drunk to handle this shit. There was no mistaking the stupid car club sticker on the back window, or the shitty rims that she thought made the car look cool. It was hers, and I was not happy. Sean walked up behind me and recognized her car a few seconds after I did.
"Ho-ho-holy shit," he chuckled. I stormed into the house and Sean followed a few steps behind. He stopped in the front hallway as I made an angry lap around and found nothing. As I got back around to the front door, Sean had gone outside and was calling for me.
"Here she is! I found her!" He was enjoying himself way too much. But he hated the girl and wanted nothing more than for me to never speak to her again. I looked to where he was pointing and saw her standing next to a guy I recognized as a cheerleader for the local college. What happened next was not one of my proudest moments, but it was pretty funny and the people who were there still remember exactly how it happened. As it registered in my head that Brittany was standing arm-in-arm with another dude, I lost my shit.
"WELL WELL WELL, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON OVER HERE IN WHOREVILLE?" Brittany looked up and when she saw me staring back at her the color dropped out of her face and she knew she was caught. I saw her mouth a silent 'Oh fuck'. For his part, the dude saw that I was talking to Brittany and bolted. He didn't run, but he let go of her arm, turned, and started speed walking down the street. Brittany turned back to me, and walked over to diffuse the situation.
"Please don't make a scene, I know these people."
"Don't make a- DON'T MAKE A FUCKING SCENE?" She tried to shush me, but I brushed her off, "Here's a scene you lying fucking whore." I spun the cap off of my liter bottle, which was about half full of my rum-orange concoction and hurled it across the front yard of the house. I should have played in the goddamn NFL the way that thing flew. It landed perfectly on the roof of Brittany's shitty car and exploded orange sticky alcoholic mixture everywhere. Brittany was yelling but I ignored her. "Let's go talk to her friend," I said to Sean. I took off down the street after the dude. Brittany was on my heels trying to apologize and explain that the guy was just a friend, but I was on a warpath.
"Lose my number, I'll drop your shit off at your dad's house," I said without losing a step. I yelled down the street, "Come here! I just want to talk!"
Sean joined it behind me. "Hey CHEERBOY!" We watched him walk into a house on the corner of the street and I figured we had him cornered. The door was locked and I tried to kick it in, but nothing happened. A window opened on the second floor and Cheerboy leaned out.
"The cops are on the way. Get away from my house!"
"Fuck you!" I yelled back, "It's rented and its a shithole!"
The window shut and Sean turned to leave but I had one last present for Cheerboy. I pushed open his in-door mailslot, whipped out my dick, and started pissing into the front hallway of his house. I unleashed what felt like a gallon of nothing but liquor and beer from the entire night's drinking. I stood up, zipped my fly, and turned around. Sean was standing in the driveway with a stunned look on his face. As I walked toward him he exploded with laughter. We walked back to the party where Brittany was sitting in her car, crying. She tried to tell me again that Cheerboy was just a friend and that nothing had happened between them. She may have been telling the truth, but at that point I didn't give a shit. We were asked to leave the party; we were already on our way out anyway. We got back into Sean's car and went back to the bar to finish partying for Halloween. The whole experience had sobered me up a bit and I needed more to drink. Brittany texted me and called me a few times that night still trying to apologize. I answered none of it. I tried to call her a few months later to see how she was doing and see if I could hook up a booty call, but apparently she had found out about the mailslot incident and to this day, we've never spoken again. It's a real shame that she was so batshit crazy and such a lying whore; I was gonna miss the freak in her. Guess you really can't have it all.